The Universe Demands to Know What it is

September 24, 2016


I exploded. I don’t remember anything before that. I was energy. I was matter and energy. I’ve had lots of smaller explosions since, but nothing as big as that first one. And now, here I am, thinking about it. My consciousness isn’t centered in just this one head of mine. I think I have different pieces of the puzzle of what I am in minds scattered all over.

I want very much to understand myself and I think I’ve been very patient, waiting billions of years. But time is running out. Eventually I’ll be no more, I think. So I need to get my thoughts together. I need to stop being distracted by the moment and live in the always, in  all moments. Then, I will see the big picture.

I have to stop being one life, one lifetime, one species, one planet, and get a good look at myself. I demand, and I make this demand of myself because I am all that there is, I demand to know what the Universe is.

More questions, under the flower:


September 9, 2016


There’s some kind of leak between my dreams and my so-called reality. It used to be one way, the normal way: bits and pieces of my life show up randomly in dreams. You know, your dog is in your dream, giving you advice, and she’s also your mother. But ever since April 13th, dream-stuff has been appearing in my waking world. For example, as I am writing this, I’m sitting in a café in Vermont, and on the chalk-written menu is raisin-flavored kombucha. Yes, Vermont is full of the hippy probiotic drink kombucha. But nobody really makes raison-flavored kombucha. It’s something I dreamed last night, along with the kombucha-flavored, vegan, raw chocolate cream pie, which I just noticed is also on display here in this café. It makes me wonder what else I’m seeing that I forget I dreamed up.

I suppose it could be that my dream of the raison-flavored kombucha was a premonition, in which case I am not the producer, just a viewer. But, the pie seems even more far-fetched. Anyway, this sort of thing has been happening more and more often, which has made me question the providence of all sorts of things that I used to assume were “just the way things are.”

Things that I now think that either I or someone else have dreamed up, possibly in one collective human dream/nightmare:

  1. Sight. The idea that animals evolved organs so sensitive to light that they can remotely infer all sorts of physical details of far away objects seems farfetched, now that I think about it.
  2. Trump. The idea that a dimwitted, egomaniacal used car salesman with no experience in government would be on the brink of being elected President of the United States seems, upon reflection, preposterous.
  3. Cultural attitudes toward sex. How is it that so many cultures regard the one act necessary for the perpetuation of their species to be immoral under most circumstances and something that should not be discussed, let alone enjoyed? Unlikely, to say the least.
  4. Meat. On the face of it, a planet where everyone is eating everyone else sounds like a nightmare scenario. Add to it that children are fed dead animals at dinner and then read storybooks about the same lovable animals having adventures, talking and forming relationships. It’s inexplicable.
  5. Trump. Oh, I mentioned that one.

Those are just the first five things that come to mind. Oh wait – mind… chemicals from the earth organizing themselves in a way as to think and become self-aware….. That just can’t be, can it?

Here’s something else unlikely to be real (click):


Disconnected Thoughts

September 5, 2016


Here are some things I’ve been thinking today. If we were eating a meal together, I would probably figure out a way to inject them into the conversation. But because I have no social life, I am sharing them here, in this blog post, with random strangers, lurkers and family members checking up on me.

  • Why We’re Hearing More Racist Comments in “Polite Society”
    • I believe that future social scientists will come to the conclusion that one result of Barack Obama’s presidency was a resurgence in public sphere racist dialogue. Not just as a reaction to Obama, but Obama gave racists an opportunity to say racist stuff that heretofore had been discouraged in public, under the guise of complaining about a President, and it just grew from there.
  • Why Nachos are Not Only Nutritious, But Why It’s OK That I Just Ordered a Giant Plate of Them
    • I was trying to come up with a list, “10 Reasons Nachos are a Good Idea for Me to Eat,” but I could only think of one thing: “The nauseating feeling of bloat I incur 3/4 into the meal will let me know I’m Alive.”
  • Focus
    • It occurs to me that there are two important types of focus: Bringing blurry things around me into view so that I can understand what’s going on in my life; and then, when I can clearly see what’s most important, focusing my energies on accomplishing it.
  • Timing is Everything
    • The maximum time period that it’s OK, as an adult, to move into an older sibling’s basement, say, if your life has fallen apart, is 10 days. It quickly goes downhill from there.
  • Public School Funding as it Exists, is Unconstitutional
    • Basing per capita educational spending on the local property tax base guarantees inequality that falls along racial and class lines. This seems like a clear violation of the Equal Protection Clause of the US Constitution, and it begs the question: Which children deserve to have more money spent on their education and which children deserve to have less?
  • Donald Trump’s Strategy
    • I was noticing this morning that due to his constant barrage of insane and offensive comments, week after week, that I couldn’t remember what I was mad at Donald Trump about a few months ago. It occurs to me that this may actually be his strategy.

Alright, that may be enough for our dinner conversation. Sorry it was one-sided. But it saved time that way. Now you can finally click on the following daisy to see what is revealed:



Thoughts on Love and Compassion

September 1, 2016

Let’s say you’re in a room doing something, perhaps meditating on universal loving kindness, perhaps just writing a blog post, and there’s a puppy right outside the door crying. And let’s say that you know this puppy and you know that all she wants is for somebody to pet her.

Read the rest of this entry »

Question Poetry

August 27, 2016


The Question

Every poem is about What am I?

Every question is What am I?

The Universe demands to know what it is.

What am I? I am all of this and nothing

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Emergency Blog Post!

August 21, 2016

Computer error

The Internet is Broken! Here’s proof:

  • “I don’t care about pandas” receives 21,300 results on Google, whereas “I care about pandas” receives five. That’s right, 5!!!!!

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Poems that will get me killed

August 19, 2016


What can I say? I like a dramatic blog post title now and then.

Personal updates:

  • I’ve decided to stop binge eating, beginning toorrow, so I have to finish off this loaf of “Four Cheese Medley Sweetbread” tonight.
  • I thought of with a new word today, “Huwomanity,”and am pondering how to use it… other than in this announcement.

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