Unesasaree leterz

The Ministree uf Unesesaree Leterz haz ishued the folowing proklamashon:

“The leterz C, Q, and X ar on temporaree hi-atus, during wich time new and yooneeke sownds will be konseeved uv and asined to them. In the interim, pleez yooz fonetik spelingz to eckspres the sownds redundantlee asoseated with theez leterz, i.e., “kween,” “zilofone,” and “kukumber.”

In adishon, the leter G iz heerbi prohibited from infrinjing upon the ritful sownd uv the letter J, and wil be fined three shekels for eech such okurrens. That iz al.”

Click here for fun with verbs and nouns

9 Responses to Unesasaree leterz

  1. Vivian says:

    isn’t this what texting is all about?


  2. IBF/TDKs says:

    How would you spell X-Ray then?


  3. ms.drama says:

    hahaha….i would LOVE to be a student in your class….your hilarious!


  4. Joe Nickell says:

    I’m sorry, ms.drama, but your “your” is the wrong one.

    …It should be “ur.”


    In seriousness, I’ve wondered if texting might finally break us free from our archaic spelling conventions – the silent ‘e’s and the “gh” as “f” and all that. A boy can dream.

    (my world of warcraft toon name, which only a couple of people in several years of playing figgered out how to pronounce)


  5. Heather says:

    Have you read Mark Dunn’s novel “Ella Minnow Pea: A Progressively Lipogrammatic Epistolary Fable”? Chapter by chapter, letters are outlawed until only LMNOP remain. As a story it may not completely satisfy, but as an exercise it is sublime, and you might enjoy it (maybe even as much as I have enjoyed reading your posts).


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