Whether it’s the cleverly morbid “Curl Up And Dye,” or the unappealingly wacky “Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow,” there seems to be an unwritten law that all hair salons in the United States have to have puns or other word plays for their names. What if all businesses operated with this requisite? I have provided some suggested names of businesses that want to follow the lead of hair salons*.
- A sign making company: Signs of the Time
- Remarkable: a dry erase board company
- A restaurant: Rest Your Aunt
- An automobile repair shop: Auto Body Experience
- Catacombs: a company that makes combs for cats
- Shoe stores:
- Sole Mates
- Well Heeled
- Heel the World
- Laced With Love
- An advocacy group trying to sneak Medicare For Everyone, also called “Medicare Part E,” into health legislation: Surprise Part E
- A fast food joint: The Queasy Meal Gets the Grease
- A soda machine specializing in small soft drinks for young women: Mississippi Your Minnesota
- An optometrist in Rhode Island: Rhode Eyeland
- A recycled carpet store: Ex Rugs Hocked and Sold**
- A liquor store: Chuggers Can Be Boozers
- I’ve been thinking about the expression, “A bird in the nest is worth two in the bush,”*** and it occurs to me that A Nerd at his Best is Worth Blue in the Tush, although I can’t think of what type of store would use that particularly inane name. Maybe a tattoo place that specializes in marking nerds with blue tattoos on their bottoms.
- A cat trainer: Faster Pussycat, Kill! Kill!
*If you would like to purchase any of these names for your business, please contact me – if your business involves chocolate, vintage punk rock records, or both, I’d be up for a trade!
**I realize that not everyone will get these puns. They may seem especially perplexing to people who did not grow up in the United States. I’d be happy to explain any of them in response to your comments.
***See comments, below.
More Strange Business Names Here: