TVs are fun. They show moving pictures while making loud noises. But occasionally they have to be turned off. This occurs late Sunday nights when your only choices are the Food Network’s marathon of Diners Drive-Ins and Drives and anything involving angry housewives on Bravo. But what to do with that 300 inch plasma rectangular black box that now dominates your living room? You could buy dry erase markers and let the kids draw smiley faces and pictures of family pets with Jay Leno chins on the screen. But this could be problematic if you have to suddenly turn on the TV to tune in to the 700th showing this week of Sweet Home Alabama, Reese Witherspoon’s endearing romantic comedy that fits so snugly into an evening TV movie slot that the Oxygen Channel has played nothing else since 2003. I like to switch back and forth between S.H.A. on Oxygen and S.H.A. simultaneously playing on Lifetime. Lifetime is usually about 10 minutes ahead of Oxygen, so I can look there to see what happens if I can’t stand the suspense – will she go back to Jake, her childhood sweetheart who’s just a small town boy? And then I can switch back to Oxygen to relive the experience one more time, before the next time it airs in 2 hours.
Sorry. I got caught up in their mixed up yet inevitable love. Which reminds me that I’ve been away from TV for far too long and I’m missing the part where Melanie and Andrew are walking down the wedding aisle and Melanie explains to Andrew that she cannot marry him because she still loves Jake and hopes Andrew will find a good woman and Andrew graciously accepts this and wishes her well with Jake. So back to the invention that will make you a million dollars. Occasionally, you forget to pay your cable bill or an asteroid hits the Earth and the cable is out, leaving you with no Melanie, Jake or Andrew and just a gigantic blank box in your house. This is when you need a sort of cozy that will cover up this eyesore and restore beauty to your home.
I suggest a decorative cover that can be draped over a TV in just such an emergency situation when nothing is playing on TV. It could have a scene, say, from Sweet Home Alabama, starring Reese Witherspoon. She’s America’s sweetheart, by the way. Or perhaps something high culture, like a Picasso print. Maybe just a picture of a blank TV screen to add a touch of surrealism. Not only will this cover protect your television screen from dust, but it will provide a spot of beauty to an otherwise empty void in your life.
I believe that this idea came from my mother, by the way. But she’ll let you have it so you can make a million dollars & help to beautify the world.
Now, look beneath this flower for more million dollar ideas!