Nonunconventional Post

tambourine-5

OK, we all know about the regular ‘ventions: intervention, convention, invention…. But what about the less conventional ‘ventions? Allow me to introduce some worthy, new  ‘ventions for your consideration:

  1. Innervention: An intervention you do on yourself
  2. Intravention: An intervention that’s kept within a social unit, such as a company or a family.
  3. Provention: Not a more positive convention, as you might have suspected, but the coming together of things. Provention is the opposite of contravention.

More New Words!

Penisn’t: When contrary to expectations, there is no penis.

Dildon’t: A malfunctioning dildo

Farmily: A farm family

Retox: Washing 3 pounds of nachos down with a chocolate coffee tequila drink after returning from a weekend yoga retreat where you were restricted to organic, locally sourced steamed kale and raw, sprouted pumpkin seeds while honoring the light within everybody for 4 days.

False Definitions!

Rely: To lie again.

Automaton: An automatic tomato.

Butternut Squash: A depraved sexual act involving one’s butt. I need say no more.

Buttercup: A depraved sexual act involving one’s butt….

Unrepeatably bad joke!

Why do tambourine players change pants after every show? Because every tambourine ends with urine.

It occurs to me that, once again, I have written primarily about butts, urine & penises in this post. This troubles me, and I fully apologize for not thinking of any cheap jokes about poop. To find some good Daisybrain poop, please click this flower:

dasy

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