How to Build a Treadmill Desk – the Series

January 15, 2018

I made an educational video called How to Build a Treadmill Desk. It has received over 20,000 views, which may not be viral, but maybe it qualifies as some sort of minor infection. Perhaps a blister. It’s gone blisterous. I followed the video with two more pieces that delve into the complex and rewarding world of making treadmill desks. Here are links to all three!


Click the daisy for something completely different:

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I’m So Bored with the USA (new lyrics)

November 21, 2017

Yankee teenager
He want to shoot some China White
He met it in New Hampshire, but now
He can’t afford a bite

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Band Names Based on Electronic Music Terms

September 6, 2017

cropped-tumblr_ocmzsayjpw1snb6qwo1_1280.jpg

Here you go:

Hi Bias

Decay

Equalizer

Compression

Hard Disk

Vibrato

Cross-Switchers

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Words we need to make it through the next year

July 16, 2017

 

Junioring: The act of claiming innocence by stupidity

Internyet: Russian use of the internet to veto an election 

Fakicity: Obvious artificiality and fakeness presented by people pretending to be authority figures

Flerp: To pass on a brain activity due to media overload. Example: In response to a question about the Trump-Russia conspiracy,  “I flerp on that,” “I flerp,” or simply, “flerp.”

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Famous First Words

March 27, 2017

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You want to start a story with an enticing first line. Here are some first lines for your essays, short stories and novels guaranteed to peek reader interest. Or at least to peek their fear. Feel free to use them as writing prompts. If you get published, please pay me money. Any amount. Enough for a bar of chocolate.

Fifteen Future Famous First Phrases:

  • I probably know more about humans than I know about my own species.
  • I promise not to kill you if you read this entire story.
  • This book explains the six easy steps you can take to achieve physical immortality.

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Google Proves Trump Right!

March 16, 2017

This week’s news has the White House saying that miners (people who dig stuff up out of the ground, not people who are children) don’t watch public television (PBS). Thus, they are proposing to eliminate federal funds for PBS. I figured that there must be a “Miners for Public Television” advocacy group. So I googled it. No “Miners for Public Television” or even “Miners for PBS.” So, the White House must be right. What else are they right about? I decided to google some phrases to find out….

  1. “People think Trump has small hands” gets zero results. Therefore, people think he has big hands.
  2. Also, no hits for “People like Hillary better than Donald.” You’re on a roll, Donny!
  3. “People think Donald Trump is stupid”: According to Google, as of March 16, 2017, only 4 people think this.
  4. Finally, 155,000 hits for “Donald Trump is the best president ever.”

So, the White House can rest easy. I decided to continue my search for truth on the internet, and this is what I discovered:

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Stand Up and Be Discounted (is the name of this blog post)

October 24, 2016

Just like the @ sign for “at,” there should be signs for “before” and “after,” something like this: and

new-note-3 andnew-note-2

Here is some Trump Haiku:

1.

This Haiku is rigged

It is against Donald Trump

It is so unfair

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