Limp Avian Turd vs. El Zen Sky

Daisybrain has migrated from WordPress over to Medium. In the process, it split into two blogs: Daisybrain and OCD-Free. The following post is reprinted from Daisybrain.

Please join Medium and follow both my blogs!

It’s time to squeeze more puns an anagrams out of the wilted cabbage that is my brain.

• Travel logs sound unwieldy for travel. I would suggest travel twigs.
• If you have stage fright and you’re making a public speech at a nudist colony, should you imagine the audience fully clothed?
• Every Christmas I feel cramped, because I always try to live in the present. But that’s a long time to stay still in a box under a tree.
• When I think about the looming prospect of a Russian invasion of Ukraine, I am unsettled by the following indisputable facts:

1. The letters of “Russia” can be rearranged to spell Sir USA, which makes Russia just a medieval version of the USA, which itself is the most violent country in the world, having invaded more nations than any other country in history.
2. “Ukraine” can be rearranged to spell air nukes.
3. “Sanctions” cast no sin. But “warfare” causes raw fear.
4. It makes sense that “European” sounds like “You’re a-peein’,” since “Europe” is our pee.
5. The Russians better watch out for Kamala Harris, since her name rearranges to spell Am liar shark. (Or Ma Liar Shark).
6. Joseph Biden presents as a bit more passive, with the anagrams Bed Pies John and Needs hip job.
7. I don’t know what it means, but Joseph Biden can also be rearranged to spell “Hep jibes, son!” Which sounds like something he’d say.
8. Most alarming are the Vladimir Putin anagrams: A Invalid Trump, Laid Vain Trump, VIP Admiral Nut, VIP until drama, Mad Turnip Vial, Variant Mud Lip, Invalid Apt. Rum, Animal Turd VIP, Valiant Rum Dip, Timid Pun Larva, Valiant Rump ID, Dim Lava Turnip, Avian Dirt Lump, Valiant Mud Rip, Limp Avian Turd, Putrid Anal Vim (has he sent the assassins after me yet?), Lava Rim Pundit, Invalid Rat Ump, Laid Up Varmint, Maudlin Rat VIP, Diurnal Vat Imp, Plain TV Radium, Primal Nut Diva, And Virtual Imp.
9. Whereas Ukraine’s “Zelensky” is simply El Zen Sky.

• In other world news, “global warming” is a blaming growl, an aging warm boil, and an all raging womb. I like the imagery of the all raging womb of Mother Earth fighting against the aging warm boil of the planet caused by the blaming growl of humans in denial.

(:)(:)(:)(:)(:)(:)(:)(:)(:)(:)(:)

That’s all the blog I have time for before whatever it is I do besides blogging. Come visit me on Medium.

Seemingly Random Facts

Fact #1: Au Bon Pain is owned by Nestle.

Fact #2: “Nestle in malls” rearranges to spell *Mental Illness*

Pro Blog

This post needed a picture of some kind.

Now time to procrastinate by writing a blog post. Remember, it’s not just some amateur crastination – it’s a pro. That’s why I am obligated to do it. You gotta listen to the pros – protractors (much better for farming than amateur tractors), procreation (God was an amateur creator; I look for creations made by pros), programmers (English teachers are pro grammars), proteins (amateur teens just don’t know how to rebel), prostitutes (clearly better than substitutes) and proverbs (regular verbs are boring).

Gram Ana

Many of you have not asked for another post of anagrams, so I bring you…

• New MSNBC star Chris Hayes is “A Shy Cashier.” Kind of seems like one. His name also rearranges to spell, “Hey Rich Ass,” as well as, “He is Car Shy.” Sorry, it just does.

The Democratic Republic of Anagramia

Does rearranging the names of countries reveal some underlying truth about those countries? Let’s try it & see….

The letters of countries, rearranged:

• Germany = Angry Me

Wordism

Compounding…

Chocolate, yes, but chocoearly and chocoften.

When someone says, “Somewhat,” ask, “Somewhy?”

When told, “Whatever,” reply with, “Whatnever!”

Wordelicacies

Word needed! A metal container is a can and a glass container is a jar. But we have no word (that I know of) for a plastic container. I suggest plidge, because it rhymes with “fridge,” and thus would be a boon to the both the poetry and music industries.

Curious Thoughts and Observations

• Consider the difference a comma can make:

The classic Christmas song, “Chestnuts roasting on an open fire,”

vs. the cannibal song, “Chest, nuts, roasting on an open fire.”

Brain Anagrams

Ways to remember brain functions:

1. The Neocortex

This is a recently evolved part of the mammalian brain. It’s the large portion of the brain that houses executive functions involving abstract thought and language, and sends out motor commands. There is no hotter executive than the neocortex.

In fact, an anagram for The Neocortex is No Hotter Exec.

Word Musings

Today at a restaurant, my 13-year-old son told me he was disappointed that the server didn’t bring a “check” like he promised – he brought a bill. My son said that he would have preferred a check, for any amount, to a bill.

We go boating, biking and  motorcycling. For consistency, I think we should base all verbs on their noun counterparts. Some might require altering the spelling a bit. For example, riding in a car we might write that we went carring in order to differentiate it from caring. I personally spent today fooding – I fooded everything I seed.

Why are there hotel rooms & motel rooms but instead of “inn rooms,” we have to say “rooms at the inn”?