Emergency Blog Post!

The Internet is Broken! Here’s proof:

• “I don’t care about pandas” receives 21,300 results on Google, whereas “I care about pandas” receives five. That’s right, 5!!!!!

Legendary Heroes: Top 5 Overused English Words of the 21st Century

I hate introductory paragraphs, so let’s get right to the list.

Legendary. This moniker applies to every famous defunct band, dead entertainer or artist. I think people mean “iconic” when they say “legendary.” In any case, Let’s make a rule: From now on, someone has to be remembered 700 years after their death for them to be considered “Legendary.”

Number Nine…

Look at these numbers:

The last one on the right, number nine, doesn’t fit, and it’s not just because I drew question marks over its head. Read on and be prepared to abandon this planet before your head implodes….

Jeux de Mots en Anglais!

Here are some strange, yet completely true, sentences;

• I messed around in toast and became Taoist.
• Eric, a man, is American.

Two Poems and a Thing

I exist outside

I exist outside

I exist inside

I am the Earth breathing the sky

I am the snow looking at my reflection in the window

I am the window

Time Again for New Words from Daisybrain

New words, better than the tired, old words you’ve grown used to:

• Ashamorse [ə-ˈshām-hȯrs] The state of being ashamed and having remorse. This word came from my teenage daughter. A related version: shamorse. 
• Arborcide [är-bər-sīd] The murder of trees (“We’re not into arborcide – we have an artificial Christmas tree.”)
• Pizzarito [pēt-sə-rē-tō] Make a pizza on a torilla, roll it up & you have a pizzarito.
• Afraud [a-frȯd] African email scams
• Christmasochist [kris-mə-sə-kist] Someone who takes on way too much at Christmas
• Kwanzaaholic* [kwän-zə-hȯ-lik] Someone who’s a bit over the top with Kwanzaa
• Vaccumulate [va-kyüm-ə-lāt] To accumulate vacuums
• Tesslatte [tes-lä-tā] My drink of choice when I am driving my (future) Tessla
• Placebotox [plə-ˈsē-bō-täk] A saline injection substituting for an actual botox treatment
• Extravagansett* [ik-ˌstra-və-ˈgan-zət] Any celebration in Narragansett, Rhode Island

—

*Courtesy Auntie Linda

To try out some older new words, click the daisy:

Things that Don’t Taste Like Their Name Implies

• Strawberry (thankfully)
• Breadfruit (huh?)
• Nectarine (better tasting than most necks)
• Currant (tastes too dated to be current, har har)
• Coconut (tastes nothing like cocoa or nuts)
• Eggplant (nope, though that would be interesting)

New Words for Old

Slight misspellings can create a new world of words. It’s like the genetic mutations that make evolution possible. So, here’s to the evolution of the language:

• Independance: A solo dance
• Burgerlar: A hamburger thief

Text Puns

1. Angle Angle Angle
2. TYPE TYPE
3. turn turn a dress
4. 9W

Thoughts that Recently Leaked from my Brain….

• Are dogs really marking their territories when we take them for walks or are we using dogs to mark our territories?