Google Proves Trump Right!

March 16, 2017

This week’s news has the White House saying that miners (people who dig stuff up out of the ground, not people who are children) don’t watch public television (PBS). Thus, they are proposing to eliminate federal funds for PBS. I figured that there must be a “Miners for Public Television” advocacy group. So I googled it. No “Miners for Public Television” or even “Miners for PBS.” So, the White House must be right. What else are they right about? I decided to google some phrases to find out….

  1. “People think Trump has small hands” gets zero results. Therefore, people think he has big hands.
  2. Also, no hits forĀ “People like Hillary better than Donald.” You’re on a roll, Donny!
  3. “People think Donald Trump is stupid”: According to Google, as of March 16, 2017, only 4 people think this.
  4. Finally, 155,000 hits for “Donald Trump is the best president ever.”

So, the White House can rest easy. I decided to continue my search for truth on the internet, and this is what I discovered:

Read the rest of this entry »

Virgin Google Phrases

February 13, 2010

Over the years, I’ve been surprised by how many phrases get zero hits on Google. In other words, apparently, until this very moment, nobody has ever typed, “naked celebrities you don’t care about” in a web site. You would think that with trillions of sentences on billions websites it would be harder to come up with an original line. But no! Here are some other totally unique phrases. Please feel free to tell me about your own, in the comments field. Remember to test the phrases in quotation marks, so all the words have to appear in the correct order for Google to report them.

  1. “That’s my cheese, damnit!”
  2. “Who has the best nostrils?”
  3. “Are you sure that’s your mouse?”
  4. “Hire penguins for cheap” Read the rest of this entry »

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